...As My Mother's LOOK Had On Me?
Today at piano lessons, I shot her The Look. As I felt my lips tighten, my chin go out to the side, my eyes narrow just slightly, and my head shake ever so subtly, I knew it was My Mother's Look.
At the same time I was giving The Look I could feel my own childhood reaction of wide eyes and nervousness rise up within me. This was surely going to work, I thought. I felt proud. I felt like I had arrived at a meaningful, time-tested strategy of parenting.
The Look failed me. I sent it again, this time with a more vigorous head shake. Nothing. No intimidation. No cessation of misbehaviour. I resorted to speaking her name seriously AND giving The Look. It was all to nought. I tried several additional strategies, each one a little more invasive (and desperate) than the last. Why was this not working? What did my mother do differently?
We left the piano lesson. I felt defeated. I resorted to the only strategy I know: Now I'm upset and you owe me when we get home. So she practiced the stuff the teacher was asking of her for me at home. But I know this will not have sufficient impact to last until the next lesson.
And worse than that, now I know that The Look has no power over my children.
No comments:
Post a Comment