How Could It Possibly Be 11 O'Clock Already?

Kindergarten pick-up time.

All I did was nurse and clean two bathrooms.

Stinky. (The bathrooms and the pick-up time.)

Oh, and I wrote this little blog.

"What's The Hokey Pokey?"

Chas asked this morning. Eliza didn't know either. Nor Naomi.

Last week they wondered what sparklers were.



I rectified the sparkler problem on Halloween and the Hokey Pokey ignorance this afternoon in our living room.

They don't have a clue what's on TV. The only music they're exposed to at home is from before I was born. We had to Google the 4th grade music craze, Demi Lovato. They don't know what's playing at the movie theatres or the name of anybody famous except Obama. I'm not sure they know that video games exist.

What a deprived existence I'm carving out for our children.

The same one my mother created for me. The one I'm so very grateful for.

What's Up With Moods? (Part II)

crunchy leaves and pink noses
sun on top and fog beneath
sweatshirt weather
a peaceful pace because we're not late
children holding hands
with each other!
and autumn smells
on our way to school this morning

All Is Right With The World.

What If I Made a List

of all of the things I do today
instead of all of the things I need to do?

It might be a really short list.

Who Does Chas's Big Pumpkin Look Like?

Don't start guessing family members.

We chewed on this one for a while.

Dallin finally got it worked out...

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Jean Claude!

.

The French Pea from Veggie Tales!!

.

Ta-Da!!!

I guess Chas had a vision when he was determined to carve the tiniest face on the top of the hugest pumpkin in our Halloween history (or Halloween future, by the way.)

Where's The Candy?

I knew I'd regret this decision. (click here)

I just didn't know I'd regret it so soon.

How Is Chas Doing? (Part II)

(original post--click here)

This is not really a post about how Chas is doing at all. How he's doing involves soccer goals and piano practices, kindergarten field trips and playdates, birthday parties and work projects with dad. A bunch of delightfully typical, normal, run-of-the-mill kind of stuff.

This is really all about a 13 mm nodule in his brain that is sitting there doing nothing. Affecting nothing. And, for the last eight months, not changing, growing, spreading, or doing anything at all.

.

Thank God.

.

Literally.

-------March 2009 MRI-----------------------October 2009 MRI----

Does It Really Matter If Kids Close Their Eyes During The Prayer?

We've been fighting this battle for 5+ prayers a day for 8 years. (That's 14,600 prayers)

Sometimes we're mad

sometimes we whisper gently during the prayer

sometimes we ignore it and hope it will go away

sometimes we have powerful Family Home Evening lessons on respecting our Father in Heaven

sometimes we have close-your-eyes contests

sometimes we recite the five things we do during a prayer preceding every prayer

and sometimes I wonder why we bother at all.

Isn't it only really about creating a personal relationship with God? Can't that be done with their eyes open?

When do we declare defeat?

Now What?

I decided to go with my cousin Jodi's theory.(click here)

And after Star Wars and limitless sugar had induced a catatonic state

I explained the dangers of sugar

to their newly forming grown-up teeth

and to their mental capacity to retain spelling words and

other equally critical scholastic information

and to their athletic prowess on the netball court and soccer field

and to the respiratory and cardiovascular health

of their distant future.

They agreed that the risks were much too great and gathered up all of their sugar and dumped it into one enormous UNICEF bag, which I promised I would, under no conditions, throw away.

So, now what do I do with all of it?

Dallin, hide it from me.

Hide it deeply.

Like, in Milwaukee.

Am I The Coolest Mom Ever?

Or is your mother coming to school riding an

Inflatable Ostrich completely mortifying?

You never know about these things.

Where's The Shallow End?

'Cause I'm tired of being in over my head.

Can I Have A Horse?

Remember that Naomi negotiated for a cat? (click here)

Chas tried for a horse.

The horse was a no, but he did secure himself a pack of Bakugan cards in exchange for the bloody thrill for Dad. (To my own dad, It was all I could do to resist saying that "The horse was a nay.")

Then, that night, the Tooth Fairy comes too!

Our kids have got a smokin' good dental plan over here.

Naomi has even begun to gamble on the US/Canadian exchange rate. Last time she was in Utah with a lost tooth, the Fairy delivered 5 Canadian Dollars. We haven't figured that one out yet, but Naomi informed me this morning that she will be banking her next lost tooth to take with her to the US where the going rate is better. Maybe the tooth fairies in the US are unionized.

It's no wonder my kids won't ever do a "pay job," just wait until the next wiggly tooth, and you're set.

How Do I Respond To The Wonderful Comments People Make On My Blog?

Do I make a comment on my own blog?

That seems a little ridiculous. And there's no guarantee that they'll see it.

Do I just read it and smile and feel loved and move on?

No connection at all?

This is what I said was so dangerous about blogging in the first place. You have relationships without actually conversing. Conversations that are two one-way streets.

Well, Mindy's favourite aunt, I know of you from decades ago. Please adopt me, and stalk me, if you'd like. I'm not promising anything... ummm... well... anything too promising, but check it out if you want.

And to friends who somehow found me out, despite my attempts to be a closet blogger, just be gentle and realize that I write under the delusion that no one is actually reading this stuff.

And to my cousins who write me witty and loving comments. I guess a one-way street is better than no road at all. I love you.

(And to my mother, I think it's time to get yourself a Google Account so that you can stop being "Anonymous" when you comment.)

And What Do You Do About The Kid

who is suddenly too sick to go to church
but has shown no sign of illness all morning?

Tell him he's fine and send him anyway?
Trust his own judgement?

Call Daddy and say, on second thought, he can be the one to stay home with the hypochondriac kids (now that a majority of them are here) and I'll go to church, instead?

Why Do Kids Always Seem To Recover Right After...

...You Tell Them They're Too Sick To Go To Church/School?

And then I find myself in the ridiculous predicament of,

"Well if you're not going to act sick,
you'd better go to school/church, after all."

I'm creating Ferris Buellers.

What's Up With Loot Bags That Cost More...

...Than The Present My Kid Brought?

Remember when
Birthday Party Loot Bags
were a bunch of junk
and a handful of candy
in a brown paper bag?

Remember how
many parties
didn't even have loot bags?

They came home from the parties today with
action figures,
and dinosaur eggs that hatch in water,
lip gloss,
and bubble bath,
ring pops,
and Kinder Surprises,
popcorn buckets,
pin ball games,
sports toys,
barettes,
headbands,
candy,
and more
all in a medium size gift bag.
Not a Loot Bag bag,
a Gift Bag bag.

The Twin Pack
12-Shot
Nerf Gun
Blaster Set
that I found on sale
is not looking as
great as it did
yesterday when we bought
and Dallin said, "Wow!"
and this morning when we wrapped it
and Chas said,
"I wish it were for me."

Could we all scale back on the loot bags, please?

How About A Primary Song?

It was a tender moment. Chas and Mark and me.

Mark looked at us with peaceful newborn eyes.

Should we sing him a song, Chas?

Yeah.

What should we sing him?

How about a primary song?

OK, what Primary Song?

"She Keeps On Talking"

If you aren't familiar with this 1980s winner, click play below.

And Question #195--How come you can't post just a song to a blog? Why does it have to be a video?

Don't I KNOW Anything?

I knew when I began this blog that I had more questions than answers, but I had no idea the discrepancy would be so dramatic.

The tally at the top has been unnerving me for weeks now.

So, I've been wracking my brain to find Answers. I'm coming up very short.

I don't know what color to paint my living room.
I don't know how many kids to have.
I don't know what to pack for lunch that anyone will eat.
I don't know how to both simplify and magnify my church callings.
I don't know what I want to be when I grow up.
I don't know where I put my keys.

But, there are a few things I do know. There aren't many, I've realized, but they're the big ones. The answers that really matter, I have. I have them and I know I have them.

Here's One. Answer #10--I Know That God is the Father of My Spirit and the Creator of My Body and that it is my potential to be like Him.

and Answer #11--I Know What Matters Most in Life. I don't do it a lot of the time. That's the problem, of course. But I know what it is.

and Answer #12--I Know That Heavenly Father Speaks To His Children. He speaks to prophets. He spoke to Joseph Smith. My life is happy because of the truths He teaches.

The disparity between Questions (193) and Answers (12) is still ridiculous, but if this were a weighted formula, I think I would be coming out ahead.

Instead of

Q + A = Me,

Something like

Q + KA = Me, where K = ∞.

Is Blogging a Complete Waste of Time?

Or is it journalling, scrapbooking, and keeping in touch with family all rolled into one?

When Am I Going To Learn

to book plane tickets as soon as I find the good deal?

Not two days later when they've raised the price by $300.

Darn!

Can a Two Month Old Be Bored?

Sometimes he's
not hungry.


Not tired.


Not stinky.


And still he cries!


The nerve!

What Are We Going To Do With All Of This?

Ummm...

Wash

Cut

Juice

Boil

Strain

and

Watch a Lame Teeny-Bopper Girl Movie until Midnight.

Welcome to Date Night!

Who Takes These Pictures?

Don't We Have Enough To Do Making Thanksgiving Dinner?

Apparently not.

Because we had to

buy a juicer,

harvest 40 pounds of grapes

and start a new project

an hour before the turkey was done.

What Are You Thankful For?

We are so thankful that you are a dodib, too.

Can You Move In?

Everyday I notice something else.

You hemmed her pants. She wore them today.

You vacuumed the car. It wasn't due for the annual vacuum for another two months.

You had the van's lug nuts tightened.

You returned the overdue DVD to the library and saved us $1/day for five days.

You caught up all the laundry.

You stocked the fridge.

You must have mopped the floor because it never stays that clean with The Big Dig going on in the backyard.

You washed the living room rug that had never been washed and was also showing signs of The Big Dig.

You cheered on the 12th place cross-country runner. In the rain, I heard yesterday.

You went to speech therapy and soccer and the grocery store. All with three kids in tow. These are feats I don't even take on with all of them if I can help it.

You left a crockpot full of dinner for us to come home to.

You even separated the odd socks by size and color into neatly rubberbanded piles!

I don't need a nanny, I've decided.

I need a Nana!

It's All Hormones, Right?

Just when I think

that I am not postpartum anymore,

I cry at the 4th Grade Cross-Country meet.

(And am glad that I am wearing sunglasses.)

When...

When is our next two-hour walk filled with rich conversation?

When do I get to see the 211 pictures you took?

When do we get to see the Red Sox win? or at least score a run?

When will we finish sorting out how to be cheerleaders to the people we love?

When will we debate private schools vs. public schools?

When do we get to finish the other topics on the list on the fridge?

When is the Settlers of Catan rematch?

When do I get to taste the pumpkin butter?

When will I get to hug Caroline goodbye?

When are you coming to visit us?

Why Is My Mood Directly Proportional to Hers?

And how do I sever the link?

y=kx

What's the Recipe for a Perfect Vacation?

3 tsp Gorgeous Weather
5 Tbl Sleeping In
1 tsp Baby Sleeping Through the Night
3 Tbl Long Walks
1 cup Reading
1 cup Yummy Food
1/4 cup Nostalgia
1 Sports Event
1 Souvenir
pinch of Shopping
2 tsp Service
1 tsp Nature
2 1/2 cups Time Alone
3 cups Spiritual Food
4 cups Long Lost Friends
11 cups Favourite Cousin

Just like my baking and stir-fries, I create it without much attention to the ingredients and amounts, THEN realize it is fabulous, and try to record it so I can recreate it. It never works very well, but I'm going to keep trying.